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HAPPY THANKSGIVING COMRADES!
To Our Friends at Notre Dame, you Golden Sons and Daughters of God on High: In the tender glow of Thanksgiving, you have so much to be thankful for! In dramatic departure from recent memory, you decry your voluptuous head coach as a plague and a wart. But friends, he is a gift. A gift from Bo Bice Jesus. Did you think you would return to glory overnight? These things take time, friends. And so, as you celebrate Thanksgiving, as you feast upon your cabbage and your blood sausage, be thankful for all he has done. And, on Monday, take action. Give this man a lifelong extension. And, in your Catholic guilt, think of this: he deserves better than you.

(Charlie game by ShockFX, plea for clemency by Big Gay Heart)